The Interconnectedness of All Things

A wise woman...intentionally strengthens herself and others.

I remember the exact moment I heard the word Ubuntu for the first time. I was having dinner with a client and we hit the ground running with our conversation. Within a nanosecond or two we were swapping our respective philosophies on life and finding common ground everywhere we looked.

About 20 minutes into our high-spirited dialogue my dinner partner offered the word Ubuntu to sum up his personal philosophical foundation. After noticing the quizzical look on my face he graciously offered a definition. 

He said, "Ubuntu means - I am because of how you are, you are because of how I am. It's a way of seeing the world, recognizing the interconnectedness of all things, and honouring those relationships."

He went on to explain that Ubuntu has many aspects to it. Intrigued and inspired I needed to know more about this new addition to my vocabulary, so I did what I always do when that happens, I consulted "The Google." Here's what I found.

"The word "Ubuntu" (pronounced uu-boon-too) is a traditional African philosophy that offers us an understanding of ourselves in relation to the world. According to Ubuntu, there exists a common bond between us all and it is through this bond, through our interaction with our fellow human beings, that we discover our own human qualities." Source - http://www.buzzle.com/editorials/7-22-2006-103206.asp 

It's amazing to me that one little word can represent something so big.

So, I let the word and its meaning roll around in my brain for awhile to determine  how Ubuntu was represented in my life. Turns out, of course, it exists in every nook and cranny of my world. Whether I consider family, work, community, nation or globe I can see how I am because of how others are, and how others are because of how I am. We are indeed connected, in observable as well as indescribable ways. The actions of one, affect the outcome of all.

So what does that mean for our lives? For me it means that I believe I have a personal accountability to take good care of myself in all ways that matter; mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually, socially, 'schedule-ly', and educationally... because how I am, affects how you are.

If we support and value the essence of Ubuntu, do we also have a collective responsibility to care for each other? To support and encourage each other? To intentionally look for ways to strengthen and raise each other up?

After reflection I now know that as we approach our seventh year since our inaugural Wise Women's Weekend, it was Ubuntu that was at the very heart of my desire to gather women together for a weekend of learning, sharing and connection to help us understand ourselves better in relation to the world. Back in 2004 I remember thinking, "I already know what I know for now, I want to know what they know." I wanted their wisdom to leverage my journey, discover more about my human qualities as I become the best version of me, and vice versa. 

Ubuntu - I am because of how you are, you are because of how I am. 

Let's continue to gather often and celebrate the power of our connectedness.

Click here to watch a clip of Nelson Mandela explain Ubuntu. 

http://dotsub.com/view/2ff54345-ea2f-492e-b62a-46a04ff2221e

Laugh Lines

A wise woman...thinks her laugh lines are beautiful.

When we're little we proudly announce to others that we're 5 3/4 or 9 1/2 years old. I remember enthusiastically telling people I was already the next age if my birthday was close enough.

I was in my thirties when I first started to hear other women complain about turning another year older. I didn't understand it at the time, but figured I must be missing something and would "get it" later on. Well, I'm now enjoying my mid-forites...and find myself still not getting it.

Fact - yes my jaw line, and the rest of my face, seems to be sliding south. Fact - my girlish figure is not so girlish anymore. Fact - when I am getting dressed for an event I think about wearing layers so I won't overheat. Isn't that fantastic! I'm getting older!

Seriously, let's put the ego elements of this topic aside, and get to the most basic question of all. What's the alternative to not aging and being able to celebrate another birthday? You got it!

The reality is, we're all going to go eventually. But does it make sense to live the time we do have, not enjoying where we are in our lives right now? Why are so many of us spending our time wishing we could stop or turn back the clock instead of enjoying the privilege we've been given to be here?

It may sound crazy - but I love my laugh lines, I've earned every one. I love the wisdom that comes with this stage in my life. It brings with it a sense of calm and knowing that I would never trade for my old perky bust or tight tush.

While I am enjoying my forties I'm also looking forward to my 50's, 60's and 70's and beyond. My friends who are there before me report that it gets even better and that they love being where they are in their lives.

My wish for women, is that we intentionally choose to turn a deaf ear to the media that is constantly bombarding us with messages that suggest we should want to be younger. My wish for girls, especially for my own daughters, is that they learn to truly enjoy every stage of their lives.

My wish for us all, is that we make a conscious decision to celebrate our lives.

"Happy Hour"

A wise woman... knows that “happy hour” isn't reserved for Friday at 5:00 pm.

Goodness knows I look forward to Friday night. Perhaps like many of you, I will often celebrate the end of a work week with a few libations in front of the fireplace, surrounded by good friends. There's a collective feeling of "ahhhhh" in the room that promotes lively conversation about the week gone by, and the weekend ahead.

But is this the ONLY hour during the week that we can call happy?

When I take time to pause and be in the moment during my day, there seems to be happy hours 'round the clock. It all depends on how I'm looking at my life.

Given more thought, I realize that happy hour for me is a quiet Monday morning cup of coffee, snuggles on the couch with my daughter, cooking with my husband after a long day, or an unexpected conversation with someone that leaves me feeling great.

What if we spent as much time looking forward to the happy hours in each day as much as we look forward to Friday evening? To me that sounds like a life truly enjoyed.

What’s your “happy hour” today?